Dear Trinity (letter one)

our cohort's classroom at Western Theological Seminary in Holland, MI

The Eugene Peterson Center for Christian Imagination's logo

A portion of the 21 enrolled in my cohort

Working the Angles

I was friends with three others when I arrived, but many more when I departed

Pastor Jonathan, Pastor David, Pastor Jon, Pastor Jeremy

Dear Trinity,

Jesus’ grace. Pastor Jonathan is 5 years older than me, and has been at Faith Reformed in Zeeland, Michigan for 5 years longer than I have been with you. You would really like him. A weightlifter, former Boys and Girls Soccer Coach for the High School and a Young Life Leader before he went to Seminary, he has maintained the exuberance and contagious joy of a coach+cheerleader+youth leader all in one. He picked us up, dropped us off, took us out, and oriented us to this very Dutch part of Western Michigan. When he talked about “his” people it reminded me of how I feel about you. Pastor Jonathan and I were joined by 19 other pastors who talked about their congregations with a depth of affection I’ve never seen among a group of pastors. There was lots of blood and bruises from the last 14 months of ministry, but very little griping. I knew the Lord of the Church, my Lord, had led me to this Doctor of Ministry Cohort after the first 10 minutes of our first session this last week. 

When I learned about this program at Western Theological Seminary, I asked Joy, the Elders, and Council, and Pastor Curtis Leins (AALC Presiding Pastor) to pray and to give approval or to veto my participation in this three year program. I’m grateful that they all gave permission. The program and my mentors are all going to be better than I expected. It is also going to be more difficult than I expected. I was pretty accurate in evaluating the external work. Lots of reading. LOTS. That is ok. I already do a lot of reading. The difference is now someone will be telling me what to read. Occasional Zoom meetings with my smaller cohort team and mentor, Dr Winn Collier. A week of in-person sessions in May and a week in January (Brrrr.) in 2021, 2022, and 2023, with a project/dissertation of 100-200 pages by January of 2024.

The more difficult work ahead of me, is actually in me. Eugene Peterson cautioned pastors that their “inside” ought to be at least as big as their “outside.” To have an interiority that supported their exteriority. Not to appear better than they really are. This is a temptation for me. Maybe it is for you too. We carefully curate our public life, our public persona, our image, too often at the expense of our soul. I don’t want that for me, and I don’t want that for you. Working the Angles is Peterson’s book on pastoral integrity. In it he names those public lines that everyone can see. Preaching, teaching, leading. But his cautionary exhortation is to give attention, to work the angles, not just the lines. If a pastor gets better at all the seen stuff (preaching, teaching, leading) without tending to the unseen stuff (prayer, scriptural reflection, spiritual direction), it is possible for a vocation to be a job. The pastor becomes a shopkeeper.

The pastors of America have metamorphosed into a company of shopkeepers, and the shops they keep are churches. They are preoccupied with shopkeeper's concerns--how to keep the customers happy, how to lure customers away from competitors down the street, how to package the goods so that the customers will lay out more money. (Working the Angles, 2)

Pastor Christenson was direct with me when we went out for pizza in the spring of 2005 before coming to Trinity. “Nathan, Trinity doesn’t just need someone who is likable or good with people. Trinity needs someone who has been with God.”

This is the vision Peterson calls “Pastoral integrity.” I thought this was going to be a program for me, but I am realizing that it is going to be for us. I thought I just needed permission, but I actually need help. Your help. Really.

How can you help?

1. Pray. I mean it. Pray for me. You don’t have to pray long, but would you pray regularly something like this: Father, our pastor wants to meet with you. He longs for you like a thirsty deer looks for fresh water. Hear our prayer for his sake. He desires integrity between his exterior life and his interior life. Speak to him. Change him. Fill him with your Holy Spirit. We only want to hear what he says after he has heard from you. We are well aware that he is not God, that he is as frail as we are, that he doesn’t have many more answers or resources than we do. But, when we called him, we called him to listen with your ears, to speak with your voice, to wash us and remind us that we are washed and claimed by you in baptism, and to feed us your real presence. Be his treasure. Be our treasure.
2. Offer to help. I have my work cut out for me. I think I know what I’m going to do for my (or OUR) dissertation, and I think it is going to help me and you. One of our mentors, Dr Trygve Johnson mentioned one of his leadership principles, “People support what they help create.” I need creative help in this project. I need some readers and editors and I need some literary advise and eventually some ethnographic case studies. I’d kind of like to convene a team of people who will devote themselves to pray for me and help me in some practical ways. Some of the building blocks that need help being built into the writing project I envision are named:

• “Benedict” 
• “Herrnhut—Moravian prayer community and movement” 
• “Ignatius” 
• “Bonhoeffer” 
• Netflix’ “Grand Design” architecture show
• “Theta Community” 
• “Book of Acts” 
• “Jack Kerouac” 
• “San Pedro Author” 
• “LA-based movie that highlights our addiction to mobility and utility”. 

Are any of those subjects of interest to you? Maybe you are just a little intrigued about what in the world I am talking about? Reach out to me! Like I said, I need help. nathan@trinitysanpedro.org.

I went away excited for myself. I am coming home excited for us. God is with us, let us attend to him and where he is at work.

Again, from Pastor Eugene:

The biblical fact is that there are no successful churches. There are, instead, communities of sinners, gathered before God week after week in towns and villages all over the world. The Holy Spirit gathers them and does his work in them. In these communities of sinners, one of the sinners is called pastor and given designated responsibility in the community. The pastor's responsibility is to keep the community attentive to God. It is this responsibility that is being abandoned in spades. (Working the Angles, 2).

Jesus’ peace,

Nathan, your pastor.